Deal breakers in christian relationships

Added: Sarrah Stutler - Date: 28.09.2021 01:37 - Views: 24764 - Clicks: 2017

This blog post is a guest post by my dear blogging friend Alisha Blue from BecomeLess. I was once told that the closer you get to your 30s, the more dating becomes like a game of musical chairs. When the music of your 20s stops, you will scramble to grab the nearest chair and settle down. I laughed at the analogy in my early 20s, but now at 28, I see the reality of it. One by one as your friends get into relationships, get married, and even begin to buy homes and start families — the pressure to settle down begins. And like musical chairs, you may find yourself scrambling to just pick someone and settle down ….

Even if there may be multiple relationship deal breakers. This post contains affiliate links. This helps me to work in Ministry full-time and cover the expenses of this blog. But before I dive into these 10 relationship deal breakers In Christian relationships and red flags in Christian dating, I want to start with this. There is a certain man that will absolutely never be right for you — that man is a man who does not believe in the Lord!

He may be everything you want in a man, but if he does not believe in Christ as his Lord and Savior…. Because from the start you will be unequally yoked. When you are trying to honor the Lord in dating and marriage, he will feel no need to do the same. It will be extremely difficult to maintain your faith in Christ in a relationship where your partner does not welcome Him. And ultimately lead to heartbreak. Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have in darkness?

And although Paul is not speaking specifically about marriage in this passage, what would we have in common with an unbeliever? At our very core as believers is our faith in Christ and that person will not share that same core belief. We cannot yoke our lives with an unbeliever — no matter how hard we try. What does that mean in Christian relationships and Christian dating?

Christ may be his Savior meaning he professed his faith in Christ , but Christ may not be his Lord. Ask yourself if he is actively pursuing a relationship with the Lord. Is he obedient to the Lord when He asks him to do something? Or does he believe that his own way is right and there is no need to listen to God? In Christian relationships, that man if you marry him is supposed to be the leader of your home. How will this man lead you, if he refuses to submit to Christ?

Whether he will lead you and your family under Christ or not is up to him. Avoid getting yourself into a situation where God is not the leader of your life and future. The basis of Christianity is love and forgiveness. Not putting in the effort to forgive should, therefore, be a red flag in a relationship with a man.

Ohh pride! The least desirable shortcoming to overcome. If your man is prideful. He will have a hard time to admit when he is wrong and unwilling to apologize. Or he may refuse to seek wise counsel as he feels that he always knows what is best. Or his pride may keep him from submitting to the Lord. Simply put, his pride runs the risk of destruction — including destroying your relationship or your marriage. And are challenged to live your life according to the Word.

You are held able for your sins and the development of your faith. He is not being held able for his sins and the development of his faith. Isolating himself from the Christian community can hurt your relationship and should be one of the red flags in a relationship with a man. Trust me, you want the man in your life to be in community. There seems to be a growing trend of believers who do not believe in being part of a church.

Very similar to not being in community, you should be wary of a man who thinks church is just not that important. So how can a person say they love Christ, but hate His bride? Only if we are in community with other Christians will we be able to grow in our spiritual gifts and become more kind, patient, loving and forgiving with each other.

Which, in return, will develop him to become the godly husband God has called him to be and enable him to develop a beautiful relationship with you. As great as that might seem, in reality, that should be a deal breaker dating for you and a major red flag in a relationship with a man. Meaning you treat them like you normally treat everyone else. So if he normally treats his family poorly and with disrespect, he will eventually treat you the same way! We are called to offer our bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God Romans and to flee from sexual immorality 1 Corinthians And being led to the bedroom will only lead to hurt and confusion.

You want to be with a godly man who is actively seeking to honor God with his body. As you grow closer together emotionally, so will your desire to grow together physically! But as both of you grow in your walk with Christ, so grows the Holy Spirit in you, which will help you develop self-control, an important fruit of the spirit. Have you ever thought about the fact, that marriage means two completely different people decide to become one?

Meaning, everything you became in the last 20 or 30 years now has to submit to and appreciate everything another person worked on for 20 or 30 years. Not the godly man, that is constantly working on growing spiritually and becoming more patient as described in multiple Bible Verses about patience. But the one that refuses to be more patient with you or people in general.

Pretty self-explanatory right? The Lord detests lying lips, but he delights in people who are trustworthy. So if something is explicitly disliked by God, it is definitely a deal-breaker in Christian relationships. In those sticky situations, we really have to seek the Lord, pray, fast, and ask for wise counsel — and then be willing to do as God says…. Even if it means letting him go! There could be a of reasons as to why he is not defining the relationship or moving it forward, including:.

Again, there is no one-size-fits-all answer. All you can do is seek God for the answer and do as He asks. I write all these things not as a perfect woman or as a woman who has never struggled with pride, unforgiveness, attending church, sex before marriage , or a boatload of other sins.

I absolutely have! There is no such thing as a perfect woman. But ask yourself if you exhibit any of the s above and if your man would be lead to end the relationship because he identified the above red flags in Christian dating and if you might be the source of any of these 10 relationship deal breakers In Christian relationships to him.

Go through a set of questions asking: Am I right for him? Am I the type of person I would want to be with? Alisha Blue is the creator of BecomeLess. She created BecomeLess. She currently lives in Houston, TX where she is a high school math teacher. When she is not teaching or blogging, she enjoys time with family and friends, taking photos, reading, traveling, and serving backstage at Christian events. This week I saw an old friend again and the Lord just reminded me that the right one is worth the wait. Many blessings! It is always good to remind yourself to who and what God has called you throughout the years.

As a divorced woman nearing 40 I wish I had someone male me take a hard look at these qualities before I married. Come to figure out that he was an abusive man. I praise the Lord that I am made new and that He will use my pain to help others but yes, listen to this wisdom. Walk away. You may never know for sure if you did the right thing but not walking away and then realizing you are in an abusive relationship is NOT the better option. Trust me. Blessings to you and thanks for writing this thoughtful piece.

Sarah, thank you so much for sharing this. So often, we younger women, ignore the warning s because of our desire to experience something now. I always pray that I am future-minded in my decisions. Your story will be a blessing to many women, please keep sharing.

Great advice. I wish I had read this before I got married. Wow Christina, thank you for sharing! So I pray that I will remember your words in the future! Great post! I think that these are valid points. That seems like a miserable place to be in after feelings and emotions become involved. Needless to say, those relationships never developed into anything. But thanks so much for sharing, a lot of women need to know the importance of not settling! Aww thanks, Tiffany for sharing. Thanks you! God bless you always! So, now I know is right to wait, that God will never leave me alone and I just need to keep looking for God and learning about him and someday all the wait will pay off.

Honestly, a lot of us girls can relate to every word you said. BE blessed! This is a really great post! Although I would like to share my story… when I met my now husband, I did not believe in God and definiently did not believe in Jesus. I remember driving in the car with him and he told me I was an idiot for not believing. We continued to date and long story short, I am now a Jesus loving woman!

I thank God all the time for pushing my husband to continue to pursue me and continue to show me Christ. Hey Sara, wow thank you for sharing. And I love that your husband was able to wash you with the words of God. Even though I think we should not strive to be in an unequally yoked relationship, I strongly believe that God uses relationships to bring people to him.

Your blog was spot on! I just separated from my husband of almost 3 years last week for every reason you listed! Although I am heartbroken, I know that one day God will send me a man who will put God as the center of our union. I am just so tired of lies and excuses- I am going to use this time to focus on strengthening my spiritual walk and know that this twisted road I am now walking will eventually lead me exactly where I am suppose to go!

Continued blessings and keep up the great work. While I was reading through this article, I was shocked that I had exactly experienced almost all of these points. I had just been dumped by my ex and indeed the point that — he might have received Christ as his Savior but never his Lord. Thanks for sharing this and I will definitely share this with my sisters in Christ and avoid making the same mistakes I did. God bless you.

Deal breakers in christian relationships

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Dating Deal Breakers: What Are Yours?